Oh where oh where did they go? Where oh where are those incomparable HIVES!?!

By D W Johnson

Not too long ago musical group The Hives could be seen everywhere. Television, radio, magazines, concert stages and even the internet. There simply seemed to be no stopping them. They conquered the hearts of millions everyday and everynight and despite being around for close to ten years were truly everybodys new favourite band.

Now the situation is very different, very different indeed. Months ago The Hives stopped doing interviews. They stopped playing concerts. They stopped showing up at hotspots for music around the globe. They are simply nowhere to be seen. What

could have happened? Where did they go? Which of the millions of rumors are to be believed? These are the questions on everybodys lips and this reporter is determined to find the answers.

My search for The Hives started with me calling their various assistants and directors of Hive chapters around the world. I also called all the record companies and booking agents that have and/or will work with The Hives. Always the same answer. -"The Hives are not available at the moment and we have no information about where they are or when they will be back."

I looked in books, I looked in magazines, I watched all the channels on my television all at once but no sign. I consulted psychics and the stars but still no sign. I patched into

that thing you see in sci-fi movies where you can see every inch of the world but those five familliar shapes were nowhere to be seen. I even looked at their website but THAT couldnt have helped me less if it was completely blank. This reporter had almost given up when...

New photo of The Hives unearthed. What does it mean?

This photo surfaced! What could it mean? The source was unknown. It just showed up at some of the places I had screened regularly. It seems to depict The Hives in some sort of lake! Thorough scanning reveals that, yes,, they are wearing black and white and looking out of sight under the surface. Carbon 14 testing has proven that the picture is no more than 6 months old. I will investigate further. Watch this space...

D.W Johnson is investigative reporter, cofounder and current president of UFO Canada, was cochair of the presidential commission on the future of diabolic research, and is coauthor of Wooden Head Specification. His work on behavioural medicine has previously been featured in The Hives